A better me.

This is going to be a long one. Its something I have learnt, and never want to forget and learn it again, the hard way.

  • Life is precious. As cliché and ordinary as it sounds, I believe I have only came to this awakening as of tonight.  This has got to do with driving. I think sometimes we do take the manner of driving home for granted. I know now we should always be thankful for  being able to arrive safely home.
  • Integrity and Self Respect. Two things I vowed never to let go of. I have always held on to my values and principles. And I know because of that I can never date someone who doesn’t have the same values as I do. Tough, but it should be as simple as that.
  • More to life. I’ve always saw life as a simple thing. Life, to me, is about obtaining joy. And I do obtain joy from living my life as an honour to God, living in an upright manner, giving, and achieving for myself as well as my parents. My life basically revolves around these things. It’s what makes me happy. But after the conversation with my friends, I feel I have been missing out not quite experienced and enjoyed the other side of life. The other part where you live dangerously, try new things (even the bad things) – well basically, the not so littlemissperfect part of life. I’d have to admit, yes I may be able to cite rules of law and cases. But I do not really have the exposure/tasted what really life can be. I guess I’ve always been living on the ‘safely’ – in the sense that I do what my parents tell me to (eg: study, have morals, etc) and not ever tasted ‘the other side of life’. BUT I figured, what brings me joy is the rewards of living life the ‘safe’ way – in sticking to my values and achieving in life, and nothing else coming in the way. HOWEVER I do feel I’m missing out on the other side to life. I realised I know very little about life; less than what I think I already know. I guess at the end of the day, we can only choose on side, and go for it all the way. I guess I will choose and have chosen the side that brings me joy.
  • More to life than books. Based on the previous point, yes I may have chosen one side. But that doesn’t mean I can extend my visions to the other side of life. There are many things  I have yet to learn from life. I do really want to learn more. From the side of life that is not of Law and books only. And guess what, that Mr J for blessing me with friends I can learn from. And a teachable spirit.
  • The love of a father. I realised my dad really does care for me. And I love the fact that he does not dictate for me to follow a set of rules. He gives me the freedom, knowing I will set my own boundaries and trusts me enough to let go. And I will never take that trust for granted.
  • Classmates that make an amazing life even more amazing. I am really thankful Mr J had placed me in Taylor’s Law School, in the October Cohort. He has indeed placed beautiful and amazing people who have taught me so much, people I am able to learn from, and is blessed by the way they genuinely care for one another. Some even show me how I am blessed. Pointing out life is worth embracing, not when you’re rich. But when you live an enriching life.
  • Judging others. I have come to the awakening that I am in no position at all to judge anyone at all. Everyone is human, they make mistakes. So do I. So if I were to start judging, I should be judging myself first.
  • Working towards a better me. Sometimes I may think I am doing things the right way. But I actually am not. I need people to tell me that. To tell me I’m not always right all the time. And the maturity and strength to take that in a positive way and change for the better of myself.
  • Ms Independent. I have indeed always wanted to be an independent person. But I know being independent is much more than driving myself around and doing things on my own. Being Ms Independent also includes how a person thinks with a degree of maturity, being able to see the bigger picture, respecting herself, and having others respect her, being able to think on her own feet in making firm decisions and choices in life, and someone who has a broader view and perspective in life. I want to be her. And I am working towards that everyday.

Many things on my mind after the conversations with people I have learnt from tonight. I never want to forget them. Thats why I’m saving my thoughts here; with hopes of becoming more of a better person, with a broader view on life. You may not understand what I have typed as it is entirely subjective. But this blog post is solely for me – to be able to read this again and improve on my growth in life. And perhaps someday reread this and know that I have achieved what I have set for myself.

These are my thoughts. I’m glad I had shared it with you. And I do thank you allowing me to share it with you.

This marks a new beginning. As of  28th April 2010, 3.41am.


4 Responses to “A better me.”

  1. if there was a “like” button for this entry, i’d press it. 🙂

    good luck with your goals, vivi!

  2. So how, can drive us out for chilli pan mee when I come home in July, Miss Sexyindependent? 🙂

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